Self Improvement/Reflective Activities for the Family Child Care Provider
developed by Pat Steffen, Ph.D., C.F.L.E.,
Extension Family Life Specialist, University of Nebraska
A. Reflective Exercises
Jot down the rules you expect children in your care to follow.

  1. ________________________________
  2. ________________________________
  3. ________________________________
  4. ________________________________
  5. ________________________________
How do you communicate your expectations to them?__________________________________
When was the last time you observed a child being good?_____________________ ___________________
How did the child respond?_________________________________
When was the last time you observed a child misbehaving?______________________________
What did you do?_______________________________
How did the child respond?___________________________
What was your short term goal?________________________
What was your long term goal?__________________________
Did your action support your short- and/or long-term goal?______________________________
B. Catching Myself
In thinking about positive behaviors of children this past week, I remember/appreciated it when_______________________(child's name)_____________________(positive behavior).
I did /did not (circle one) compliment him/her for this specific behavior.
An appropriate compliment that was/could have been given is "_____________________(child's name), ________________________ (your feelings and what the child did.)" Remember to use the child's name. Example: "Sharon, I'm glad you are sharing the toys with Brandon this morning. He seems to enjoy playing with you."
During the next week I will watch for and compliment children for their positive behaviors.
_______________________________
Caregiver's Signature
C. Reflect back to a time when a child misbehaved.
If you were to analyze the misbehavior from the child's perspective,
the reason(s) for the misbehavior was probably because he or she was:
____not feeling well
____feeling rejected
____lacking knowledge or experience
____upset and felt insecure
____discouraged
____felt unloved
____lacked confidence
D. How many times during the past week/yesterday do you remember using the following positive discipline techniques?____________________________________
Number of times

______ I used a positive statement about what I wanted a child to do rather than telling the child what not to do. Each time I did this I gave the child an opportunity to do the right thing.

______ I gave a child an opportunity to demonstrate that he or she was competent. Each time I did this I helped the child develop self confidence and a sense of responsibility.

______ I said "yes" to a child's request--rather than responding with an automatic "no" or "maybe." Each time I did this I listened and respected the child's thinking.
______ I ignored misbehavior and focused on positive behavior. Each time I did this I kept a positive attitude myself.

______ I gave positive recognition(compliment or praise ) to a child for doing something right. Each time I did this I helped build the child's self esteem.

_______I let a child experience the consequences of his or her behavior. Each time I did this I let the child take responsibility for personal actions.

______ I used a structured consequence that was related, reasonable, and respectful. Each time I did this I provided positive discipline.

______ I gave child a choice about courses of action rather than dictating or nagging. Each time I did this I gave the child an opportunity to make a wise decision.

______ I remained friendly, calm, and detached when disciplining a child. Each time I did this I focused on the unacceptable deed, not on the worth of the child.

______ I used time-out successfully. Each time I did this I gave the child/children a chance to feel better about self, cool down, avoid combat; think about actions, choices, and consequences.

______ I modeled an appropriate behavior. Each time I did this I taught by example.

______ I was consistent in disciplining from one situation to the next. Each time I did this I showed that children can expect to be treated fairly.

______ I sent messages in which my non-verbal and verbal messages were consistent. Each time I did this I sent a message that children could understand.

______ I listened and responded respectfully to a child in my care. Each time I did this I helped the child respect and value his or her thought.

______ I provided encouragement for a child to do something he or she had not done before. Each time I did this I helped the child become resourceful and responsive.

CONGRATULATIONS!

Well done on your highest numbers! The techniques for which you reported the lowest scores offer a challenge to you. Select one or two of these techniques you want to increase during the next week. Keep a daily record of how you are doing.

Editor's note: to print the chart on one page go to File/Page Setup and set margins to top-.20, bottom/left/right-.25.

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