Discipline begins early in the life of a child. When infants are fed, kept clean, nurtured and cuddled, they are learning forms of discipline. When we speak of discipline, we address the teaching and protecting of children. The objective of discipline is to teach. If we consider discipline as teaching, it becomes a process rather than a method, and if a process, it is something that continues throughout our lives. Teaching and learning are lifelong processes. The purpose of discipline is to raise healthy, happy, confident, responsible children who will grow to become people who think for themselves, care about others and make positive contributions to their world. Discipline is setting limits and offering guidelines to follow in order to learn correct behaviors. Discipline teaches children how to conduct themselves, in ways considered proper, without adult supervision. Each time adults talk with children about values that are dear to them and each time adults behave in ways they want children to imitate, discipline is being taught.
Discipline builds self-esteem and positive relationships between adults and children. It teaches responsibility, respect for self and others, problem solving skills, self-control, and independent thinking. Discipline helps children feel secure.
Adults should be aware of what children can do at what ages and levels of development if realistic guidelines are put in place. Adults must talk with children about what is expected and what is needed by both adult and child in the teaching situation. To tell a child what not to do does not teach that child what is expected. Effective discipline begins with good communication.
Discipline is not to be confused with punishment. Discipline builds character and helps children move from a stage of dependence on others to a stage of dependence on self with knowledge of when and on whom to call for assistance and support. Punishment hurts. Punishment makes one feel unworthy, unloved and ashamed. Punishment may change undesirable behaviors for a short term but it will not teach positive alternatives to those behaviors.
For those who work with children, it is good to review information that provides an overview of the ages and stages of children's development.