The day I received my family child care license, I breathed a collective sigh of relief! No more staffing worries, employee evaluations, schedule changes, etc. The human resource department was closed, because I was self-employed. However, working in family child care also has its pros and cons.

For example, there is little adult/coworker contact during the day and I couldn't afford to go right out and buy all of the equipment and teaching materials available in many commercial centers. However, I would be working with a smaller group of children and I could stay home with my own children. Also, I wouldn't have staffing troubles, because I was self-employed.

Then reality hit home. I may be self-employed but, I still had a staff and the staff was me. It is tough to sit down and tell yourself, no you can't call in sick tomorrow because the boss will know. It is frustrating to not be able to ask for a day off on short notice because there is something you are just dying to do but, no one to cover for you. The biggest challenge of all, however, was to sit myself down from time to time, reflect on the work I was doing, and point out areas where I could improve. It was difficult at best. After all, doesn't the boss usually have the final say, and wasn't I the boss?

I finally came to the following conclusion. I was a family child care provider because I wanted to serve children. I wanted to have a positive impact on future generations. I wanted children to know that it is okay to make mistakes, it is noble to be able to say you're sorry, a sign of good character to always strive to better yourself and to help others. I could never attempt to teach this to them, if I wasn't willing to at least try and learn it myself.

Now, on the first Saturday of June, in large letters on my calendar, you'll find the words REALITY CHECK. On this day, I take myself out to lunch, spend a few minutes thinking about the summer ahead and the fun things we can make and do in family child care during the warmer months. Then I settle in to evaluate the past year.

• Did I meet at least some of my goals?
  
• Did I do my best to turn children on to education?
  
• Did I provide a safe, loving, stimulating environment for the children entrusted to my care?
  
• When I sit quietly in the middle of my playroom at 9:00 a.m. on a Monday morning, do I like what I hear? Squabbles aside, are they happy to be at my family child care?
  
• Did I involve parents in my child care program? Did I provide opportunity for conversation, support and appreciation for family?
  
• Were there times I could have been a little more patient, flexible, understanding?
  
• Did I listen as much as I spoke?
  
• Did I give time to my own family? Do we ever have enough time? I'm not sure. But are they comfortable with my decision to be a family child care provider?
  
• Did I seek out opportunities for professional growth (training, networking, researching, etc.)?
  
• Did I remember the importance of personal and spiritual growth? Just sneaking in 10 minutes of uninterrupted rest and relaxation every few weeks can do wonders!

I end my yearly evaluation with a recommitment to me, my profession and always, ALWAYS, to the children. For if the children in my care are content, if they feel loved and secure, if they are happy to be children, my mission is complete!

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